Transcription

White text on black background that reads “if you do these for 30 days you will be unrecognizable

  • sleep 8+ hours
  • drink 2L minimum of water a day (high pH if possible)
  • get sun daily
  • no sugar
  • read for 30 mins a day
  • workout 3x / week
  • capture someone and cut their face off and sew it onto your face
  • meditate for 10 mins daily
  • Treczoks@lemmy.world
    47·
    11 days ago

    The unrecognizable will already come with “2L water (high pH if possible)”. Just go for “water” with pH 14. Two liters a day will make you unrecognizable.

  • RememberTheApollo_@lemmy.world
    37·
    11 days ago

    This “high ph” garbage is such crap. A few years back people were chugging apple cider vinegar to acidify your blood or whatever BS that was.

    Our bodies regulate themselves when it comes to ph, drinking water of a certain ph won’t change that. Just like drinking juices or sodas that have citric acid don’t mess it up. Alkaline water benefits are a myth.

    But if it helps you drink more water instead of junk drinks, go for it.

  • 1984@lemmy.today
    10·
    11 days ago

    I tried drinking a lot every day but noticed no difference except needing to go to toilet like 5 times per day and watch my pee come out almost without any yellow color at all.

    • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world
      1·
      10 days ago

      There’s two possibilities here: either you were already getting proper hydration from food (fruit, vegetables, soups, stews etc all have a bunch of water), or you weren’t getting proper hydration from drinking water. The latter could be because you lack electrolytes (you can buy em as a powder and add to your water), or you weren’t spacing out your drinking properly. You can only absorb so much water at once (about 250ml every quarter hour at most). Sipping slowly all day is key, chugging a lot at once isn’t going to benefit you much(unless you’re trying to fight a urinary tract issue like kidney stones or sometimes a UTI).

    • Droggelbecher@lemmy.world
      1·
      10 days ago

      Can confirm, have takeny concerta, skipped most of it to look for the joke and only read the second from last one properly. Efficient humor consumption.

    • ickplant@lemmy.worldOP
      7·
      11 days ago

      Don’t give up, that just means you gotta practice. Maybe start with a child, their skin is softer and easier to manipulate.

    • fonix232@fedia.io
      4·
      11 days ago

      I did do it at one point, but the reading was more like 3-5 hours a day, and hardcore dark romance smut.

      My girlfriend broke up with me because “she couldn’t recognise me in bed”. In hindsight, making her ride the handle of a knife might’ve been a smidge too far.

      • Aeao@lemmy.world
        4·
        11 days ago

        Really depends on the girl. I knew a girl once who wanted the grip of my gun in her. Well she wanted the other end but I believe in always treating a gun like it’s loaded. So we settled on the grip.

        Whatever you are into their is someone out there into it too.

        That girl is a teacher now.

        • fonix232@fedia.io
          5·
          11 days ago

          Okay so admission time, that’s not really why we broke up. The cadence of the story was just better that way.

          In reality, we “broke up” (reduced the number of dates we had) because we were in a poly relationship and things were becoming more serious (as in, thinking about children and getting married) with her primary, which I fully support.

          The books were after her recommendation, by the way, they did unlock a few new kinks (and reinforced plenty existing ones), and the sentence “I can barely recognise you (in bed)” was indeed muttered a few times, so I was mostly truthful, but you can see why the cadence came out better in the original comment.