I worked way too hard turning this post legible.
Most of the state name changes are brilliant, but some are either weak or jokes I didn’t get (“Mime SODA”?), or maybe I just misread the whiteboard chicken-scratch. Regardless, suggestions for alternatives encouraged; I’ll post an updated version if there’s interest.
Alt text:
spoiler
A map of the United States of America, with the state names changed out:
Washington - Obama
Oregon - Whoregon
California - Caliphornia
Idaho - Weedaho
Nevada - Old New Vegas
Montana - Mount-a-man-a
Wyoming - Yaoiming
Utah - Putah
Arizona - Gayrizona
Colorado - BIPOColor-ado
New Mexico - New Sexico
North Dakota - Top Dickota
South Dakota - Bottom Dickota
Nebraska - Neosbraska
Kansas - Transas
Oklahoma - Wokelahoma
Texas - New California Republic
Minnesota - Mimesoda (Minnesoda?)
Iowa - Biowa
Missouri - Missyuri
Arkansas - Arktransas
Louisiana - Lesbiana
Wisconsin - Wiscumsin
Illinois - Polynois
Michigan - Michicano
Indiana - Libdiana
Kentucky - Demfucky
Tennessee - Themussy
Mississippi - Mxissippi
Alabama - Alabortion
Ohio - Omegahio
West Virginia - Estroginia
Maine - Ukraine
Vermont - Hermont
New Hampshire - New Tofushire
Massachusetts - Maskachusetts
Connecticut - Connecticunt
Rhode Island - Rode v. Wade Island
New York - Mamdanistan
New Jersey - Nude Jersey
Maryland - Gay Marryland
Delaware - Delawoke
Washington DC - Doll City
Virginia - Vagina
North Carolina - Nonbinary Arolina
South Carolina - Sapphic Arolina
Georgia - Orgya
Florida - Fursona
Alaska - Allahska
Hawaii - Hawahe/him
Also labeled:
USA (United Socialist Allahism)
Gulf of Mexico - Gulf of Gay Sexico
If you really want to rile up from West Virginia, call it Left Virginia. I do.
Oh also the new California Republic is actually where California used to be. I think Caesar’s Legion is actually in Texas.
Everybody fears Omegahio. Think Ohio, but 20,000x worse. There is no hope. There is no escape. It is already too late.
I love that I now live in the New California Republic, but I’m really tempted to spend some time exploring Whoregon
How to make Oregon and New Mexico the top tourism destination states 😄
You’d have a hard time convincing me to support most of these (because that is how humor works), but lemme tell you I would wholeheartedly and enthusiastically support an entirely serious campaign to rename Washington to Obama. It would make talking about where I’m from like 84% less confusing.
Just wait till you see Obama’s women!
This would be better than the current nickname “Husky Women” we have for UDub women’s sports.
I feel ya; the constant “Washington STATE” is a real drag.
I greatly appreciate the work you put into this. The original was barely legible.
Thank you! Despite its genuinely funny content the original post didn’t get a lot of traction, so I wanted to give it a little polish in hopes that more people would get a chance to enjoy it.
As a resident of Missyuri, I welcome this change wholeheartedly.
pegsylvania lol
I don’t get neosbraska
Neopronouns, I’d take it.
maybe no-bra-ska?
Obama… Then I saw Alabortion. Perfect. 👌
Estrogenia! Mountain mama! Take me home, country roads!
Well, the Republicans are big fans of renaming shit. Might as well get used to it.
Whoregon is a genius way to get east coasters to pronounce the name properly XD
I’m thinking “YoreGunsAGone” mighta worked too.
Oh yeah, the red flag state!
Is it Or-e-gun? Or-a-gone?
Or-eh-gun, don’t stretch out the e.
It’s actually pronounced like “organ” (two syllables)
The former!
It’s very.,. Sex-positive. I guess we are just way sexier than the gop. Which makes perfect sense.
Vagina got me 🤣
Virginia is for lovers, after all.
Bottom dickota really tickled me
