One of the rare green texts that could very well be true
While perhaps not fake: still gay because with fiber poops he’s preparing to receive anal!
I’m sitting in my office at work, this shit had me giggling like an idiot
This is one of the best poop writeups of all time
I first read that as “shitting in my office” and I was like hell yeah brother
After I posted it I reread it just to verify I didn’t mistype. But if I had, you can bet id just leave it that way
Had anon tried drinking water with their fiber?
The lore doesn’t mention it.
I was looking at fiber supplements on Costco’s web site, and there was one where the guy had more or less the experience above, but after just one. He said he wouldn’t touch them again after that.
I can’t help but think that if this is what happens after taking just one, you really, really needed to have a fiber supplement.
my dad complains about horrible bowel movements every time he goes for fibre toast rather than plain white, i truly do not fathom how some people are alive
Classic. My favorite line is the guts screaming in German.
Now that is a true shitpost!!!
Silly anon. All that compressed fiber intake and /fit/ neglected to tell him he needed to drink ~6 l/h of water to maintain proper hydration.
You remind me of my kid. Every time I say something they recognize as untrue they call me “Silly Daddy.”
Today they went to an event where they assured me they’d be swimming (a claim their mother disputed). When they got back, I asked whether they had enjoyed swimming.
“We didn’t swim, we just put our feet in the river. There was no pool. Silly Daddy!”
Wait till they find out about your silly tiles!
Funny enough, ten minutes ago I was telling a friend of mine how everyone always (understandably but incorrectly) assumes I got this username from the tiles. And calls me Tony.
I don’t disagree that the tiles are silly, though there is a documentary (on hulu when I watched it, not sure about now) about how the truth is closer to them being sad.
edit: I’m not exactly sure when the tiles started appearing, but I’m at least 60% confident that I had this username beforehand.
I miss these old green texts
i’ve been shitted off about the recent posts on here that werent shitposts this shitpost is truly the shit
Oh so the “don’t poop for three days” guy from two years back just needed a few fiber bars and strong conviction
Why is it good to not shit for 3 days?
The original post seems to be gone, but you can read about it in this cross post: https://lemmy.world/post/455290
They never told us so we’ll never know
I never realized the post was making a joke about the OceanGate sub until just now reading another thread.
At the time, June 2023, they were searching for the missing sub and thought they could have 3 days to survive. So OP was probably making a dark humor joke about how to avoid shitting in the sub.
But they were so vague that it had everyone - myself included - speculating on why someone wouldn’t want to shit for that long.
strong conviction
Why would you need a strong conviction to keep your bodily function at bay for no positive effect?
And why do you talk in third person about yourself?
Oh sorry, you may not know. By “they” I mean the guy who posted about needing to not poop for 3 days. There was a post a few years back where a guy asked for advice on not pooping for a few days and he would not tell anybody why he needed to not poop.
As for conviction the greentext makes it clear this is not a comfortable situation. Anyone wanting to do this in order to not poop, for whatever reason, would know what comes for them if they follow this method
This one always makes me laugh.
Fake: wiping his ass
Gay: wiping his ass
Fake: He had Dwanye “The Rock” Johnson in his ass
Gay: He had Dwanye “The Rock” Johnson in his ass
This sounds amazing.
