Given how many species we drove to extinction, dogs got it pretty good

We talking jizz? Huge fan of jizz.

https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/Jizz

Woah is that a covered stoop? Whores.

Uno is too big of a number he’d probably get confused

You think I want a seal who’s name is still literally seel evolve into a dugong that’s also just named dewgong? or do I want to see sealmon become omniwar metal sealteam6mon?

Stepping into an unavoidable puddle and feeling the dirty floor water fill my socks

CNN’s inability to call out trumps lies and fascist tendencies over the years is how we got here. If media giants weren’t focused on maximizing profit, there would be less people regretting their vote right now.

Are these the immigrants that are stealing all our jobs?

“can you smell what the rock is cooking?”

Really? They don’t get to choose if it’s alright for their kids to hear about their gay teachers husband. But drugs, that’s important for democracy to work

Is it “too early” for them to choke on a bag of dicks?

In space, no one can hear you creme…

Wait a minute… that turned out too horny

Tldr: classic corporate non-response

Honestly, they might have had their response made by AI as well. Really really really bad AI.