For real? I think you’d need to get them SSNs, which might be a problem without a birth certificate or even birthday. That being said, if you are responsible for nurturing them and keeping them alive I’d say that’s a clear dependency, so I think you’d have a bureaucratic nightmare but a fun court case.
“Birth Certificates are discriminatory against the unborn. The government should be required to issue Pre-birth certificates so that SSNs can be assigned to children yet to be born.” -Future GOP policy champion probably
Honestly, what is keeping anyone with frozen eggs/embryos or whatever from claiming them as dependents based on the ruling?
I totally fucking would. It would do one of two things:
The Alabama state government would make me a multi-millionaire overnight.
completely reverse the ruling.
For real? I think you’d need to get them SSNs, which might be a problem without a birth certificate or even birthday. That being said, if you are responsible for nurturing them and keeping them alive I’d say that’s a clear dependency, so I think you’d have a bureaucratic nightmare but a fun court case.
What? No birthday or SSN? It’s almost like they aren’t really children!
“Birth Certificates are discriminatory against the unborn. The government should be required to issue Pre-birth certificates so that SSNs can be assigned to children yet to be born.” -Future GOP policy champion probably
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By that same logic, could a business owner of a corporation claim said corporation as a dependent because corporations are people now?
Somebody get Nathan Fielder on the horn.